January 16, 2009

 

Each of you has grown through your Iron Brides experience. What are you going to do to continue your personal growth(s)?    What action(s) will you commit to?  What are you willing to change?  What has your fiance’s, and your families reaction been to this committment?

I am committing to maintaining my efforts of not complaining! So far it has been s struggle for me with our Complaint free world bracelets, but when I feel a weak moment coming on and all I want to do is complain or be negative, I just refer back to Betsy’s speech and how negativity affects everyone around you. This will be an ongoing effort for me, but it will help all aspects of my life tremendously. It’s amazing how much happier I am and Phil & I are as a couple when I don’t complain and stay positive.

Needless to say, Phil loves that he can point out when I complain and tell me to “Switch wrists!”

January 16, 2009

 

What change(s) have you made personally as a result of Iron Brides?   Consider your wedding, your relationship with fiancé, family, or friends, or a financial change.

 

 

 

 

 

One thing that changed me as a result of Iron Brides is yoga. I have always loved yoga, taking classes here & there, but now learning how we can do it on our own has really motivated me. I think Phil thinks I am becoming obsessed because we will be driving home from going out to dinner and I’ll say, “Ohhh I can’t wait until we get home so I can do my yoga!” He knows when I say I am doing my yoga in our bedroom it means do not disturb! One time by accident he opened the door as I was in a downward facing dog and he gasped and said “Oh my God I am SO sorry!” and quickly closed the door. This really showed how supportive he is of me and my efforts to use yoga as a tool to not only get in shape but to relax as well. He knows that I need space and time to accomplish the things I want to do. I am thankful to Iron Brides for teaching us these simple, yet effective yoga practices. This has also motivated me to work out more and make smarter choices when eating. I want to win that weight loss competition! I need it the most! 

 

 

Regarding our wedding, Iron Brides helped me realized that I have a lot planned already and shouldn’t be stressing over much at this point. Iron Brides has helped me put life in perspective and realize that Phil & I are whats most important in the wedding planning process. It is our day and as long as what we want to happen happens, we will be happy. A vision was created with the help of our vision boards through life coaching and that helps me to know that stressing about small things are not worth it.

I have also realized that I am a truly lucky person. I don’t know how or why, but I always seem to be blessed with enriching and amazing opportunities in life. Not many people can say they were part of a show like Iron Brides. It’s not your typical reality show (Thank GOD!) and all the people involved are with us for the right reasons.

Ok, so you know me and my quotes & song lyrics…Here is one of my all time favorite quotes about the special experience that Iron Brides has been.

 

“People come into your life for a reason, a season or a life time. When each one happens, you’ll know exactly what to do.” 

Sounding off from my last official blog from Iron Brides! I hope you learned about me, the other brides and what a great show Iron Brides is going to be. Make sure you watch us and vote for the bride you think is most worthy of being deemed THE  ORIGINAL IRON BRIDE!

XO,

NICOLE

 

Lightning Round Questions! January 7, 2009

“How does it feel?”   Planning your wedding isnt just to choose a color or a style, per se, its also to choose a mood.  Through the planning stages and actual wedding day, what do you imagine your wedding will feel like to you and your guests?    Try to limit the feeling to ONE WORD that will, in a nutshell, describe what your wedding mood will be.  Then, list characteristics that help define your wedding mood such as:

• MOOD: FUN!
• The defining characteristic  Classic & cute
• best setting Country Club
• what the most expensive version would include Too many things to name…live band, open bar, more donation $$
• what you would make due with playing music from our Ipod
• what colors would be seen Celery green, black & champagne
• what you would be wearing Maggie Sottero Glam!
• what your cake would be like BIG and simple
• what food serving style would you have A plentiful, scrumptious, sit down dinner
• favors would look like what something that doubles as a place card holder and is practical
• would there be an after-party Of course! In our suite at the hotel-we have the whole  honeymoon to be alone!
• how about a morning-after brunch Of course!
• what would you hope to hear from guests as they leave AMAZING WEDDING NICOLE & PHIL! AND “It was so “YOU GUYS”

These are a few of my favorite things… January 7, 2009

You are engaged….What are you and your fiances wedding daydreams?  Have they been amended with having the experiences given by presenters at Iron Brides?  Along with these questions answer each of the following in its own short paragraph form:

I don’t want to speak for Phil, but I can sure tell you my wedding daydreams. I want the day/evening (we’re getting married at 5:30 p.m.) to be beautiful, nice weather is always a plus. I want everyone that is important to be able to be there and I am envisioning the evening to go off with no major mishaps! I really hope that all the guests will dance, not just me & my crazy bridesmaids

These dreams have been amended with Iron Brides in the planning aspect of the wedding. The organized wedding software is going to help immensley with my invitations, save the dates, etc. and all of those important things. I have also learned to take things slower and yoga has helped me calm down and hopefully helped with my get in shape efforts!

What are your best memories of real and movie weddings?

Some of my best wedding memories have happened within the past two years. Phil & I attended about 15 weddings in the past wo years together, so there are  a lot of memories there! Phil’s friend Jay (one of his groomsmen!)  and his wife Kristen’s  wedding in New York of had the most beautiful cocktail hours I have ever seen. There was a raw bar, a mini burger station, carving station, sushi station and–the best thing yet–an ice luge with a make your own martini station!!! We were so full after this, we thought it was the dinner, but NO, we go in and sit down for the most amazing dinner, with a menu where you choose what you want right there at the table! This was followed by dancing with a fantastic DJ and dessert stations that included ice cream truck novelties, chocolate fountain and so many yummy desserts. This wedding was one of the most elaborate we have ever been to and it was a blast!

What are your best romantic times spent together?

Phil & I are both very busy-always on the go! When we set aside time for each other, we do it right! Just recently we went up to North Conway together for the weekend to celebrate my birthday. Phil did everything to make sure I was happy and comfortable. We got there and did some shopping (he knows the way to my heart ) Later in the evening, he arranged for us to go on a sleigh ride at this beautifully decorated farm about 10 minutes from North Conway, then we went down to a pub and had a delicious coffee cocktail to warm up! We had dinner and just relaxed all night, it was a really nice get away.

What is your favorite music?

I have a very different taste in music. For example, as I am blogging, I have my internet radio on the Phish station, where they play Grateful Dead, Bob Dylan, Allman Brothers and of course Phish. I totally have the hippie side of me, so this kind of music along with artists like Paul Simon, Cat Stevens, Elton John, Carly Simon, etc. are what make me happy. I also have an obsession with ROD STEWART. My sister & I go see him every time he comes to Boston! Yeah!

So this is how eclectic I am-I also LOVE the new New Kids on the Block CD-we went to the concert this year and it was truly AMAZING, I am not even lying! I am a Britney Spears fan, her music is great to dance to and she is a great dancer herself. She is also a fellow Sagittarius, so I have to support her, I have always liked her. Other artists I enjoy are David Grey, Ryan Adams, Mika, Coldplay, James Taylor, (who are all on my wedding play list a few times!)

Do you have favorite charity(ies)?  If so, what are they?

Being an animal lover, Phil & I plan to donate to the MSPCA for our wedding. We love our cocker spaniel Hurley and had a great dog Clancy who we had to put down in May. We plan on getting another cocker this spring when Hurley’s breeder has more puppies! We are happy to support the MSPCA, who helps so many animals in need of homes! I think if I went to adopt a dog, I would want to take all of them home with me.

Do you and your fiancee have favorite foods?

Phil can be a little picky when he eats. He likes most things plain & traditional, like meat & potatoes, plain cheese pizza and he LOVES Chinese food! Being a vegetarian, I love things like whole wheat pasta with veggies, homemade veggie soups & veggie chili, and of course pizza, but mine has to have a topping! I am also a big fan of cheese & crackers and veggies & dips at parties, this is one of my weaknesses! One thing we do enjoy together is sushi, since I do eat some seafood and Phil likes the cooked rolls, we often get sushi take out or go out for sushi together.

What are your favorite colors?

My favorite color has always been green! I am working a celery shade of green into my wedding, along with black, because it is classy & classic, and champagne is our accent color. I think these colors go well together and it is not your run-of-the-mill wedding colors!

Do you have a favorite travel destination point?

I haven’t traveled much outside of the U.S. but I will say that I love California! Phil lived in Hermosa Beach, Ca when we got together after college, so I went out there to visit him and that’s where we rekindled our flame, so Cali has a special place in my heart. We have a trip planned for this spring to go to California and to Vail, Colorado, so I am very excited for that!

Below is a picture of Hermosa Beach and the area that has some great shops & restaurants.

What things have you and your fiancee decided “together” upon doing or incorporating into your special day?

Phil & I decided that we want to provide round trip transportation for our guests at our wedding. Our reception site is about 20 miles from the ceremony and it can be a little hard to find, so to eliminate stress for the guests, we plan on having one big coach bus transporting our guests around. This will also hopefully eliminate any possible drunk driving and make everyone feel safe and be able to party hardy!

Have there been obstacles along the planning process that you may not have agreed upon?

So far…so good…8 months to go so I am sure there will be some!

Fear of failure… January 2, 2009

Write about the ‘glass ceilings’ in your life. What things do you believe you cannot do because of fear or inability other than a physical limitation (examples: jump out of a plane, handle spiders, speak in front of an audience, become President, etc.). You must tell us why you can’t do this/these things, and if you had a previous experience with it (negative experience). In addition to this, include 1-2 totally awesome things you wish you could do before you turn 60 and why you have mentioned these things.

 I couldn’t think of  a concrete fear that I have. I am the first one to kill spiders, I can comfortably talk in front of people and heights don’t bother me.

I have a fear of failure. I especially hate when failure is in front of other people, I get embarrassed easily and I never  want to appear as a failure in any aspect of my life. With my job, I was too scared of failure, so rather than embarrass myself, I didn’t even bother to apply for the Director position with recently opened in my office. I  figured if I just stay as an Associate Director, there is less of a risk of failure because I already know what I am doing on a daily basis. There was just too much risk for potential embarrassment if I did something wrong or made a bad decision as Director. I disregarded the potential for a significant raise and huge advancement in my career in education and just took the safe route.

I am not sure why I am this way. I never had some huge embarrassing experience in my life, but I do recall turing red in class if I got a question wrong, or excusing myself to go hide in the bathroom if my team lost a game in gym class. I liked the feeling of accomplishment when I won the “most books read award” in fourth grade, I liked being voted to be the cheerleading captain both my junior and senior year of high school. When I found out I got the job as a Graduate Assistant after graduating college, I was ecstatic! Now I can feel the accomplishment of getting this great job, and a free Master’s Degree!

 

After I completed my two-year stint, it was time to start looking for a real job-Uh oh potential for failure Nicole! I didn’t know what I would do if I didn’t get a job I interviewed for. Luckily, I got a fantastic job working for a private college south of Boston. Then, there came a time where I wanted to explore more and branch out of higher education. I took a job in corporate America and after three months-I was in a living hell! I couldn’t stand to get up and go to work every day and I regreted ever leaving education. I didn’t know what to do, how embarrassing will it be if I quit a job after only three months? Everyone will think I couldn’t hack it in corporate America! With the support of my amazing boyfriend (not fiancee yet!) I quit the job because it was the best thing for me. I couldn’t live my life dreading to go to work everyday. Work is something we all have to do, so if you are not enjoying it, you need to get out-life is just too short. I don’t regret making the switch to the corporate job, it was a learning experience. For the past 8 months I have been working at a school that I love, doing what I love which is admissions and advising for adults who want to go back to school.

This is something I struggle with every day, but at some point I will need to swallow my pride and know that failure and embarrassment are all parts of life and they are all learning expieriences!

Now, you ask, what are two things I would like to do before I am 60…

Get another Master’s Degree–I love school!

Travel to Italy so I can see where my grandparents came from.

 

Hope you liked learning about me and my fears, I really put it all out there for you this week!

Happy 2009!

 

XO,

NC

A Complaint free world…Phil’s dream come true! January 2, 2009

 

When I saw Mark & Betsy at our taping last weekend, I didn’t think much of it, they are often with us when we are taping. I was caught by surprise when Betsy started talking to us about a concept that she says saved her marriage. I never thought it would be something that I could relate to so much. Complaining-there are a lot of different names for it-venting,whining, nagging,  or one of my favorites: “I’m just stating a fact!” I will be up front here, complaining is one of my biggest flaws in my life. It has been since I was little-my Dad is constantly saying something like these words to me: “Nothing is good enough for you Nikki! All you do is complain! Will you just stop nagging on Phil? Leave the guy alone!”

Oopsie…

This is something I try to work on, let’s face it- nobody likes to be around a constant complainer! Given our latest assignment, I am thrilled to take on the challenge of switching my pretty magenta bracelet every single time a complaint comes out of my mouth. When I came home to tell Phil about it, he had a smirk on his face from here to the hills and couldn’t wait to start “reminding” me to switch the bracelet when needed! However, he refused to wear the bracelet himself because it was “pink”. I think he is just  a little scared to realize how much he complains!

I had to start doing some more research on how this concept came about. Will Bowen,  minister from Missouri came up with the idea to curb criticism, complaining and sarcasam in his church congregation. It has taught people to be slower thinkers and really think about what is coming out of your mouth and how it effects others around you. Will said it has opened people’s eyes on how much people complain; even if they think they are a generally positive person. One couple from his congregation discovered how much they talk negatively and/or complain, so instead of switching the bracelet all day long, they decided to just stop talking for a whole day! Now that is a good way to learn a lesson!

This bracelet concept is really catching on. There has been over 6 MILLION bracelets circulated world wide and wasfeatured on media giants such as the Today Show, Oprah and Fox news. If people take this idea seriously, we will be slowing building a more positive world for our children. There is so much negativity in our world and I think this is because it is easy to be negative, it takes more strength to be positive and see the bright side of things, even when it looks pretty dim.

So join me and the Iron Brides in trying to live complaint-free. It has been a struggle so far, but it is an eye opener for sure! I know I haven’t been even close to going a full day without switching the bracelet, but it helps if you have a fiancee who loves to point out your complaining-you’ll be switching that bracelet before you know it!

Below you will see the lovely piece of rubber I will be donning on my wrist-probably forever!

A Marshmallow World December 23, 2008

I actually heard this song for the first time this year. I love Dean Martin & Frank Sinatra and this song just really caught my attention because it was quirky, light hearted & made me really smile! The you tube video is totally vintage and fun! And how handsome are these guys?!?!

If this video doesn’t make you smile than you must be related to the GRINCH!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zPulmvbiNCY

 

It’s a marshmallow world in the winter
When the snow comes to cover the ground
It’s the time for play, it’s a whipped cream day
I wait for it the whole year round.

Those are marshmallow clouds being friendly
In the arms of the evergreen trees
And the sun is red like a pumpkin head
It’s shining so your nose wont freeze.

The world is your snowball, see how it grows
That’s how it goes whenever it snows
The world is your snowball just for a song
Get out and roll it along

It’s a yum-yummy world made for sweethearts
Take a walk with your favorite girl
It’s a sugar date, what if spring is late
In winter it’s a marshmallow world.

 

The meaning is simple, its beautiful in the snow and it looks like marshmallows everywhere!! And, when you are with the one you love, its even better!

Phil & I were in North Conway this past weekend and it was indeed a marshmallow world-lots of snow up there!!!

 

 

This is the night of the big storm last Friday, my two loves of my life–Phil & Hurley playing in the park! Doesn’t it look like Hurley shoved his face in a bowl of marshmallows??  And marshmallows falling from the sky!! HEHE

 

So when you hear this fun tune, probably on oldies, think of how beautiful it is in the winter! Even when you are shoveling, driving in the snow or dreading going out to walk the dog in the storm, just sing a marshmallow world and everything will be ok   No promises, but it might help!

 

XO,

NC

Christmas miracles for the future Mr. & Mrs. Cargill! December 23, 2008

This particular assignment is fun, because Phil & I are really excited about our future! We can’t wait to have children and start our family together. Also, since Phil LOVES Christmas, our Christmas traditions will be plentiful for sure!

Five years from now…maybe one or two children by then….they will hopefully be at that really fun age for Christmas, around 3-4-5 years old where they can really enjoy the excitement and magic of Santa! We will hopefully be able to divide our time evenly between both of our families. We are lucky enough that most of our family is no more than a half hour/45 minutes away from each other, so it would be nice to make this work! I know both my parents and Phil’s parents will be just ecstatic to have grandchildren around so it will be lots of fun!

One really cool tradition I just learned about and hope to start with my children is the book “Elf on a Shelf”. http://www.elfontheshelf.com/index_html.php

This is a great story, along with a toy elf that joins your household before Christmas. It really brings to life the mytique of how Santa really knows if you’ve been naughty or nice! I have heard great things about children really getting into this elf and making sure their behavior is just right, because the elf is watching–and he will let Santa know! I look at it as a fun way to ensure good behavior, especially around Christmas! I actually bought this for a family friend with a 3 year old and I can’t wait to give it to her so they can start the tradition!

Cooking is also very important to me and my family, so I hope to teach my children young about helping in the kitchen and maybe making homemade goodies to give as Christmas gifts to teachers, neighbors, etc. Exposing children to cooking and being domestic is a great foundation for future well-roundness! (I can thank my grandmother & Auntie Lisa for this!)

The holiday season is a great time for Phil & I–with my birthday being in the beginning of December, his on Christmas Eve and then Christmas Day with family, it is really a fun time of year!

Merry Christmas to all & I hope your family traditions are wonderful & joyus! Enjoy every moment  you  have with loved ones this year!

XO,

NC

A classic party favorite-with a healthy, trainer approved, twist! December 19, 2008

One of my all time favorite appetizers is Spinach & Artichoke dip! And when you think of it, it sounds pretty healthy, so how bad can it be for you? Shockingly, some recipes can provide over 10 grams of fat & 400 calories….per serving!!! Here is my twist on this dish which saves a lot of calories and fat.  I love making recipes my own and swapping out high fat ingerdients for fat free or low fat options. Especially for us Iron Brides who are trying to get fit, this will be a good chance for us to still enjoy this at parties and not feel too guilty! I would recommend toasting some  whole wheat pita bread to make your own healthy pita chips for dipping!

• 1 (8 ounce) package of fat free cream cheese, softened
• 1/4 cup fat free mayonnaise  
• 1 clove garlic, peeled and minced
• 1/2 teaspoon dried basil
• 1/4 teaspoon garlic salt
• salt and pepper to taste
• 1 (14 ounce) can artichoke hearts, drained and chopped
• 1/2 cup frozen chopped spinach, thawed and drained
• 1/4 cup fat free shredded mozzarella cheese  

DIRECTIONS

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Spray a small baking dish with cooking spray.
2. In a medium bowl, mix together cream cheese, mayonnaise,  garlic, basil, garlic salt, salt and pepper. Stir in artichoke hearts and spinach.
3. Transfer the mixture to the prepared baking dish. Top with mozzarella cheese. Bake for  25 minutes, until bubbly and lightly browned.

 

Even Phil, who is hesitant to try my healthy creations–loves this dish! And its vegetarian friendly

 

Enjoy!

Some extra money always comes in handy! December 18, 2008

Hello All!

So I am taking our blog assignment for this week and dreaming of all the things we could do with an EXTRA $6,500 dollars for our wedding. I thought this would be interesting to see what I thought we should do with it and what my fiancee would do with it. Phil is a very caring, giving and compassionate person, so I was not too surprised to see his response. We decided early on that we were most likely not doing typical wedding favors like candles, candy, etc. and things that can be easily forgotten about. We know we want to make a donation to some causes that are important to us. With some of  the extra money, we would put more into the MSPCA, mostly because of our love for our dog Hurley and our old dog Clancy, who was put down about 6 months ago. We want the money to benefit those who work so hard and volunteer their time to save and help animals, and to give more opportunities for resources for animals in need. It is such a shame to see how many animals, specifically dogs, are left for adoption due to mistreatment and/or abuse. If we can help just one dog get proper medical care we will be happy! Phil would allocate $600 to the MSPCA of our extra money. Another $600 would be donated to the American Cancer Society to benefit all of those so deeply effected by the awful disease. We have some people very close to us who have suffered or are suffering with this, and every little bit helps to come one step closer to a cure! One important thing we have learned from people around us that are still cancer ridden, yet strong surivors is the power of positive thinking-its amazing what it can do!

Since Phil is so loving, generous and kind, needless to say, he has a lot of friends! When we first started thinking about our guest list and hit 225…we had to sit and do the dreaded “B” list! It’s nothing personal against anyone if they are on a “B” list, and these days I think people are very understanding of working with a budget and trying to keep costs under control. You can’t possibly invite every single friend/coworker/acquaintance who has impacted your life or every single relative from coast to coast! If we had some extra money, we could invite all those other special people who otherwise we may be unable to invite! When we picture our wedding, we want it to reflect all the journey’s we have taken, together or apart, and all the people have made us who we are today. With that said, it would be appox. $1500  from our magical new money to invite those extra people.

With our guests happiness and comfort being a top priority, we would also use the remaining money to provide hotel rooms  for our guests. We don’t want our guests to feel inconvenienced by attending our wedding. We want it to be relaxing and not break the bank for them! Imagine going to a wedding and having everything including your hotel accommodations taken care of for you! That would be nice The remainder of our extra money is about $3,800 so that should cover a good chunk of rooms for our guests.

I would have to agree on all of these things with my wonderful future husband! Looking at what we are financially able to donate to our two causes was not as much as I would have liked, but every little bit helps! Being able to donate more would make us feel like we are starting our life together with similar goals and objectives in mind when it comes to supporting special causes. With both of us being people pleasers, we would love to see our guests happy and have the Corvini/Cargill wedding one they will never forget!

In closing, must I refer back to one of my favorite songs in a previous blog? Money helps but its all about being with the one you love! Cheesy I know, but true when you really reflect!

“And even though we ain’t got money,
I’m so in love with you, honey,
And everything will bring a chain of love.
And in the morning, when I rise,
You bring a tear of joy to my eyes
And tell me everything is gonna be alright.”